melting pot design……
Sunday, January 25, 2009
Good morning!
I just saw you on the Saturday morning news, and thought I’d ask my question of you.
I’m 50, a single professional woman living in New Haven. I’ve lived apart from my parents for the last 30 years. As soon as I can sell the 1300 SF condo where I’ve been living for 3 years (not happening quickly), I will be buying a single family home so that I can move my aging parents in with me.
We’ve managed to sort through some issues – we’re only looking at places that has at least 1 BR/BA on the ground floor – no more stairs for them! And I think we’ve planned fairly well and all three of have made compromises on house style, neighborhood, yard – we want this to be a success.
But. I realized recently that my folks decorating style is not at all like mine. They like Swedish modern (Ikea is their favorite store) .. and that leaves me cold. I’m traditional/casual, my current living room has a leather sofa and chair, an iron and wood Baker’s rack.
I don’t have pictures to send you … we haven’t yet moved. Can you give us some tips on combining our styles in a way that we can live with? We don’t want to live in separate spaces (other than the bedrooms, or course), we really like the idea of living as a family. But we do want to make sure that no one feels excluded or resentful. And although our homes are not ugly, none of us is really famous for our design sense.
Thank you so much
Heather Hogle
New Haven, CT
Heather~
Thanks for tuning in to WTNH and sending in your question!!
Multigenerational housing………….congratulations! You and your parents are trend setters! I am glad to see you have considered a first floor bedroom and bath for you parents. I would additionally suggest that if the perfect house has a bathroom that is not large and spacious, you should consider what some of the surround spaces are and if these spaces up for ‘grab’……….where am I going with this? As your parents age you may need to renovate the bathroom, creating a handicap accessible or barrier free designed space. If adjoining spaces, i.e. closets or small rooms can contribute to the new bathroom space this would be ideal. If or when the time does come, retain the services of a designer to assist you in developing the space it will be well worth the money!
New multigenerational housing is designed with a central nucleus space which includes a great room, kitchen and dining space, then off the the nucleus, individual private ‘wings’ spring off. It appears you will be purchasing an existing home with your parents not building new, so ‘wings’ most likely aren’t an option. Yet you can still have your own private space, yes your bedroom and possibly and second room to serve as your ‘den’ or ‘office’ the additional space should be your own escape……the same goes for your parents. If complete additional rooms aren’t available then the bedrooms should be designed to be more than just sleeping quarters. Remember you have lived apart from you parents for more than half your life, you and your parents have come to enjoy your own routines it will be a challenge to come together again. Not that you don’t all love each other……….it’s just well, you may enjoy the staying in your pj’s till noon on Sunday drinking coffee and reading the paper…….and mom & dad have always enjoyed a bridge game promptly at noon on Sundays-which they host! The first few Sundays it may be OK….but after a month of rushing though your routine-it will probably wear on your nerves. So let’s plan for that private space ………. maybe even squeeze in a bistro table in a sunny window for you!
OK, now to answer the bulk of your question about style. This is really not as difficult as you may think. I have melded design styles for decades. It is very common for couples to have very different tastes and styles that I have needed to bring together. I have affectionately called this melting pot design. Of course……..compromise is the most important ingredient to a successful melting post design. Here are some guidelines in blending your different styles
- think eclectic!
- break away from pairs……for example end tables don’t need to match
- Purchase a few new items all three of you like………maybe a new area rug in the great room, Heather breaks away from her traditional oriental rug, Mom & Dad break away from a the bold geometric rug they have and together you purchase a transitional rug
….here’s an example of three rugs they may not be exactly your or your parents selections but I think you can get the idea
Your rug…………………………….Mom & Dad’s rug
this rug still does reflect some traditional qualities as much as it reminiscentof a contemporary geometric pattern ………..bridging both your styles and tastes
- when it comes to blending furniture use the same approach, your leather sofa, their coffee table flanked by new end tables………here again are a couple of examples
bridge with end tables remember don’t match them coordinate instead! 
…..Keep in mind compromise, and seriously if you both can have your own spaces to enjoy it would be a good thing. Multigenerational housing is the way of the future. More and more families are living together under one roof…….. I myself have experienced in it in small doses with great success so I expect you will too! Enjoy your new home ………..and new lifestyle!
